rambling.

there are times when i think we all feel like human wrecking balls...like anything that we do is just gonna hurt someone else...maybe that is just me, in this moment--right now...but i'd like to hope that at some point we all get this way..speaking for myself, though.because that is all one can do...right now i feel like anything i touch is just going to fall apart somehow..i know that is over-dramatic and a little absurd..but its the gosh darn truth...i find myself doing things/saying things/acting certain ways when i get into a mood like this that are simply ridiculous...i know that, when i'm talking to someone for example, and i freak out or get frustrated..that it has nothing to do with them..then i get into this whole thing..its like a pattern and it has happened numerous times...i feel bad about being wierd, then i try to explain it without actually getting into talking about things that i dont even understand (like why i actually feel off) and then i get worked up and then sound more ridiculous than i started...i dig myself into these holes in my mind and they can be pretty damn deep sometimes, let me tell ya....i dont mean to be like all negative but that is just where my mind is at right now...i dont know what to do....make up with myself? i dont think that is gonna happen cause its not about like apologizing..as much as i do all the time...cause that isnt solving anything if i dont feel better myself, and that goes for anyone..i'm sorry world, i do not mean to be sitting here rambling on about myself but its just what i felt like writing about...wait! see there i go, i just apologized right after having stated how that is a dumb thing to do (unless, of course, an apology is actually needed)...grrrr....oh well, in this life i think we are all just trying to figure it out a little everyday...a close friend of mine sent me an email today and included this quote:

"Love is not a conditional commitment to a perfect person, it is an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person. We come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."

they did not say who said it...so for whoever said this quote, i like it and sorry i cant give ya credit! haha....the ones we love are the ones we "take it out on"...but the thing we need to remember is that they do love us...the people we love, love that we are imperfect..they love that we make mistakes...it is unhealthy to be upset about silly crap, ya no? and that isnt what i am saying...i'm not really upset about anything, especially silly crap...i dont even know if that quote really relates to what i was talking about earlier in the post but i just really liked it and it made me stop and think..hey, life's ok. so for all y'all out there right now who are wondering what its all about...just know that you are not alone...and that there is someone out there (regardless of how much you've convinced yourself there isnt) that loves your imperfections more than you will ever know.